Eat, Save, and Be Healthy

When we were kids, one of the first practical jokes we learned to play on each other was to tell someone their zipper was down (or something was spilled on their shirt). When they would look down in alarm, the other person would say “made you look.”  The person being pranked usually acknowledged the joke with a sarcastic “ha-ha.” I don’t know if that joke is popular today; but I’m going to assume not because for the joke to work you would first have to use a crowbar to pry the cell phone out of the kid’s hand to redirect their eyes elsewhere (sorry about the social commentary).

 But young people today aren’t the only ones not paying attention. Adults are just as guilty when it comes to ignoring warnings, particularly financial ones. You can’t solve your problems if you won’t (a), look at them, or (b), acknowledge them.  People think if they just ignore the threatening letters, bills, or phone calls, money problems will cease to exist. Not looking means not having to deal with the problem. That started me thinking about times when I have physically closed my eyes to avoid looking at something, and I came up with the following short list:

• Roller coasters
• Scary parts of horror movies
• Seeing any body part exposed that is normally under the skin

Okay. All Right. Some of the things we fear are not rational; they may not make sense to others who aren’t afraid of those issues. But closing your eyes when it comes to finances, while understandable, is a form of denial. No one cares if I cover my eyes when I ride the Blue Streak at Cedar Point, but a lot of people care if you don’t pay your bills.  And they will not let you off the hook just because you don’t want to deal. They are going to be committed to “making you look.”

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For all the parents of teenage girls out there, does it seem as if your daughter’s life is constantly filled with DRAMA?  They do too! Recently the Women’s Fund of Central Ohio commissioned a study of over 2,000 girls with diverse backgrounds, from Central Ohio.  The girls ranged in age from 5^th to 12^th grade.  The study was interested in learning more about the things that girls feel as the important issues they are dealing with. 

Overwhelmingly, what seemed to rule the thoughts of the tweens and teens? Dating and friends.  When asked what are “some of the big things that girls your age are dealing with,” girls in the 5^th through 7^th grade rated ‘friendships’ as the top choice, with ‘dating’ coming in second with all but the 5^th graders.  After the 7^th grade, the top choices switch, with ‘dating’ coming in as a top stressor, and ‘friendships’ coming in behind.

Another interesting finding from this study of girls in Central Ohio was that they would rather talk to other girls their own age than adults, even adults other than their parent.  The girls often felt that adults didn’t understand them, and didn’t really listen to them and what was going on.  Perhaps the adults were too quick to try to downplay the importance of the issues the girls were going through.  While from an adult perspective we may be able to realize that fighting with a friend or breaking up with a romantic interest is not “the end of the world,” to these teens that are very focused on peer and romantic relationships, and may have fragile self-esteem, these things can feel like a world altering dramatic event.  In the Executive Summary of the findings, author Lisa Hinkelman offers the following analysis to parents of tween and teen girls:

“While adults have the benefit of wisdom and experience — they must recognize that a girl’s only experience is her current situation.  When she goes through a difficult relationship, she does not want you to tell her that, “There are other fish in the sea” or “I know how you feel”. Rather, she wants you to validate her intense emotions and realize that her feelings and experiences are all new to her.  She wants to be listened to, trusted, supported, and encouraged.”

To learn more about the study or the findings, you can find a link at the website for the Women’s Fund of Central Ohio: www.womensfundcentralohio.org.

Feeling surrounded by negative news, negative people, negative everything?  Then look at life through a fresh set of eyes.  We are also surrounded by positive news, although sometimes that negative stuff gets in the way.  Here are some positive trends happening right now:

*We are safer. Murders, robberies, rapes and assaults in the U.S. were down 3.5% and auto theft dropped 39% from 2007 to 2008; burglary has dropped 43% since 1989.

*We use less energy. Average per person energy use is down and our economy overall is more energy efficient.

*We live longer and feel better. We will live about 10 years longer than our parents did.

*Youth are smoking less and using less alcohol and hard drugs (including meth, cocaine, LSD and hallucinogens).

*We are conserving fuel. Although some of this might be attributed to the rising cost of oil and gasoline, mass transit usage is higher than at any time since 1956.

*We donate time and money. Both adults and youth are volunteering more with non-profit organizations.  And, despite tough economic times, $300 billion was donated to charities in 2009.

*We are driving more safely with fewer fatal car crashes.

*We are giving away what we no longer want or need, which keeps our cast-offs out of the landfill.

*Forested land has increased in the past 30 years.

*Our air is cleaner since the six most common air pollutant levels have fallen since 1990.

*Exercise is on the move.  Fitness programs for older adults, strength training, and working out with a personal trainer have all seen increases.

*The local food movement has hit the ground running.  We are growing and preserving more of our own food.  The maker of Kerr and Ball-brand mason jars reported canning equipment sales increases of 30% in 2009. 

*Research by the American Heart Association, published in 2009, showed that women who expected good actually live longer. Positive thinking can impact physical health and interactions with others.   

Spring brings with it fresh air and sunshine, a chance to enjoy the beauty of nature, and an opportunity to see the positives in the world around us. Look for those positives and share them with others. 

Author:  Christine F. Olinsky, Miami Valley Area Leader and Extension Educator, Family and Consumer Sciences, Montgomery County

 Why not take the pledge today?  By making just 2 small daily changes you can start on the road to improving your health!   Take 2,000 more steps over baseline–about 1 mile–and eat 100 fewer calories– by eating smarter.

Walking is a daily activity that most people can do.  And it requires no special equipment other than a good pair of shoes.  To track your progress, wear a step counter for a minimum of 3 days in a row and then try to increase your daily steps.

Check out the America On the Move website for information, support, and tracking options:  www.americaonthemove.org

Author:  Linnette Mizer Goard, Extension Educator, Family and Consumer Sciences, Ohio State University Extension

Remember when you were dating how you looked forward to spending time together, you did special things for one another without being asked or expecting anything in return and shared the good and bad things in your life. If a marital relationship is not built upon a solid foundation of friendship, it may become more difficult for partners to stay connected over time or to become less polite and respectful to each other as time passes because they feel more comfortable with each other. However, spouses who remain good friends throughout life usually find much more enjoyment and satisfaction in their relationship.
Here’s a list of several things that might help to keep your friendship alive, read through and see what you already do and what you might try?
• Talk – really about each other for 15-20 minutes every day.
• Hold hands, open doors for each other, be respectful to each other.
• Go for walks- the weather is getting nicer, turn off the TV and get outside.
• Dance- what’s your favorite music? Your spouse?
• Play games- card games, board games- a great way for family time in the evening.
• Work on a mutual project together.
• Plan little surprises for each other.
• Laugh together.
• Compliment each other often- look for the good things.
• Leave unexpected notes of praise.
• Develop signals that say “I love you.”
• Say “thank you” for little kindnesses.
• Talk about your dreams.
• Say “I love you.”
• Remember birthdays and anniversaries.
• Have a candlelight dinner.

When I treat my spouse like my best friend, many of these actions come naturally. Daily acts of kindness can promote the growth of romance in the marriage. When many people think about romance, they envision going away for a weekend to celebrate their anniversary or receiving a dozen roses. Most of us would think that’s romantic but researcher, John Gottman has found that true romance is best preserved when partners frequently respect and care for each other in ordinary ways. Little things like preparing a favorite meal or sending an unexpected note or even helping with the projects at hand have shown to have a dramatic impact upon the quality of one’s marriage.

Research has shown that the amount of fun time spouses spend together is a major factor in the happiness of their marriage. Sharing enjoyable times prevents people from getting bored with their relationships and helps rejuvenate them when they are very busy and preoccupied with other cares and concerns. That means that we really have to plan to make time for our marriage, it can’t just be the “leftover” time at the end of the day or weekend if we expect to really have a strong marriage. It does not matter what the activity is, as long as it allows both partners to relax and enjoy each other’s company.